What did the policeman say to his belly?
You are under a vest!
Why did the skeleton cross the road?
Because it had to go to the Body Shop!
A cowboy rode into town on January 5. He stayed in town for a week and rode home again on January 5. How is that possible?
His horse’s name was January 5!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Frank.
Frank who?
Frankenstein!
Why did the lady put lipstick on her forehead?
Because she wanted to makeup her mind!
A dumb guy works at a donut shop. It was his first day there. A customer walks in and says, “How much are these donuts?”. The dumb guy says, “I don’t know.” So the customer left. The manager walked in and said, “No, no, you’re supposed to say, ‘Only a dollar and 25 cents.'”
Another customer walks in and says, “Are these donuts fresh?” And the dumb guys says, “I don’t know.” So the customer left. The manager walked in and said, “No, no, you’re supposed to say, ‘Yes, yes, very fresh.'”
Another customer walks in and says, “Can I buy these?” And the dumb guy says, “I don’t know.” So the customer left. The manager walks in and says, “No, no, you’re supposed to say, ‘If you don’t somebody else will.'”
A robber walks in and says, “How much money you got in that cash register?” The dumb guy replies, “Only a dollar and 25 cents.”
The robber says, “Are you trying to be fresh with me?” The dumb guy says, “Yes, yes, very fresh!”
The robber says, “Can I shoot you?” The dumb guy replies, “If you don’t somebody else will!”
The robber says, “Are you trying to be fresh with me?” The dumb guy says, “Yes, yes, very fresh!”
The robber says, “Can I shoot you?” The dumb guy replies, “If you don’t somebody else will!”
