A panda goes into a restaurant and orders one of everything. After he eats he grabs a gun and shoots it, no one got hurt. So a waiter asks him ‘why?’ so the panda winks at him, tosses him a dictionary and leaves. So the waiter goes to see what the dictionary says and he finds a page about pandas, so he reads what it says:
‘The panda eats, shoots, and leaves.’
What do you call two octopuses that look alike?
I-tentacle twins!
Why do fish swim in salt water?
Because pepper would make them sneeze!
What did the salad dressing say to the salad?
Don’t look at me I’m dressing!
Math teacher:If you were 7 last year, how old will you be next year?
Kid:Nine
Math teacher:Impossible!
Kid:No it isn’t teacher, I’m eight today!
What do you call a pig that takes karate?
A porkchop!
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