What does stuck seaweed say?
“Kelp! Kelp!”
So there was a soldier and he told the general”The infantry is coming, the infantry is coming!” and the General said “Warn the rest of the soldiers.”
And finally when the sapling arrived a different general said, “Finally I’ve been wating for this little guy to come. I’m gonna go plant this Infant TREE.”
What is the difference between a teacher and a train?
The teacher says “spit out your gum!” and the train says “chew chew!”
What search engine do cows use?
Moogle
Why didn’t the nose get on the soccer team?
He did not get picked!
A man drops his watch out the window of a 16-story building. He goes down the elevator and stops to get a soda. Then he walks down 12 flights of stairs and walks out just in time to catch his watch. A second man below says: “How did you do that?”
The first man says: “Didn’t you know? My watch is 5 minutes slow!”
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