What is the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anybody can roast beef but NOBODY can pee soup!!!
What does a cow read every morning?
A moo-spaper
What did the robot say when it couldn’t catch the train?
“Cannot commute!”
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze!
Why did the man take a pencil to bed before sleeping?
To draw the curtains!
Why does it take longer to run from 2nd to 3rd than from 1st to 2nd?
Because there is a short stop between 2nd and 3rd!
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