Why did the turtle cross the main road?
To get to the Shell station. He was running on empty!
Why do golfers wear 2 pairs of pants?
In case they get a hole in one!
What kind of witch has cheese and ham on it?
A sandwitch!!
Three bats lived in a cave surrounded by three castles. One night, the bats bet on who could drink the most blood. The first bat came back with blood on his fangs. He said “See that castle over there? I drank the blood of three people.” The second bat comes back with blood all over his mouth. He said “See that castle over there? I drank the blood of five people.” Then the third bat comes back covered in blood. What does he say?
“See that castle over there? Well, I didn’t.”
How do you cut the sea in half?
With a sea saw!
What travels all around the world but stays in one corner?
A postage stamp!
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