What do pigs rub on themselves when they feel sore?
Oinkment!
What does George Washington use for his ID?
A quarter!
What do you get when you cross a whale and a cow together?
Shamoo
What do you say to a good-looking mouse?
You look mice today!
If a teacher tells a class to put their pencils down, why didn’t they put them down?
Because they were all holding pens!
It is greater than God and more evil than the devil. The poor have it, the rich need it and if you eat it you’ll die. What is it?
Nothing. Nothing is greater than God, nothing is more evil than the devil, the poor have nothing, the rich need nothing and if you eat nothing you’ll die.
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