What do you get when you cross a teacher with a doctor?
Doctor, doctor, I feel like a spoon!
A woman rushed into the doctor’s office and cried out, “Last night I had a dream I ate a giant marshmallow!” The doctor answered, “Calm down, it was just a dream.”
A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his patients to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands. When the day of the game arrived, everything seemed to be going well. As the National Anthem started…….the doctor yelled, “Up Nuts” and the patients complied by standing up. After the anthem …he yelled, “Down Nuts”. And they all sat back down in their seats. After a home run was hit, the doctor yelled, “Cheer Nuts.” They all broke out into applause and cheered. When the umpire made a particularly bad call against the star of the home team, the Doctor yelled, “Booooo Nuts!!!” and they all started booing and cat calling. Thinking things were going very well. The doctor decided to go get a soda and a hot dog, leaving his assistant in charge. When he returned, there was a riot in progress. Finding his assistant, the doctor asked, “What in the world happened?”
What did the doctor say to the mother who entered the doctor’s office yelling:
“Doctor! Doctor! My baby swallowed a roll of film! What should I do?”