What do pigs put on when they get burned?
Oinkment!
Why don’t aliens have a doorbell on their spaceship?
Because they are trying to win the Nobel Prize!
How do you make a witch itch?
Take away the ‘w’!
What has cities without houses, rivers without water, and forests without trees?
A map!
When asked to write a paper on what he was thankful for on Thanksgiving little Timmy wrote:
I’m thankful that I’m not a turkey!
Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes, a building can’t jump at all!